Fall Blog

Our Decision to Adopt


For Tanya, the decision to adopt came very early in life.  Her parents were informed of her inability to have children early in her infancy, but they wisely chose to wait to tell her until she was old enough to understand what that meant to her.  She was forced to come to terms with her infertility during junior high school.

For years now, she has been able to search her heart for understanding, answers, and healing.  Being a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (LDS, or Mormon), much of her healing came through learning about the significance of the temple and the role it plays in our lives.  These experiences drew her close to the Gospel and helped her to know that adoption was an incredible opportunity and a great miracle.  She almost considers herself lucky in her circumstances, in the sense that unlike many families who struggle with infertility, her future was clear from the second she learned of her sterility.  She didn't have to suffer for years with misguided hopes.  While emotions related to infertility manifest in different ways at different stages in ones life, she has had ample time to mourn and move forward and spend her energies and resources preparing for adoption.

She reverences those mothers who bravely and selflessly place their children for adoption.  Because of their great love for their children, and because they want everything good for them, they place these beautiful infants for adoption and offer her a blessing she would otherwise never know for herself. 

Ryan learned of Tanya's infertility during their dating years and became a huge support to Tanya when he assured her that he loved her, felt no differently toward her, and wanted to share his life with her.  Like any other challenge that has come to them in the past 13+ years, they have coped with this particular loss together.  His deep love for Tanya, together with the years of perspective she was able to share with him, made the loss more manageable for Ryan.  He knew that through adoption, he and Tanya would be able to raise a family and in that knowledge, he found peace.

Today, we have felt and seen the blessings of adoption directly and through the support of Families Supporting Adoption (FSA), an organization dedicated to the support and education of community and families who are considering adoption.  We love the hope adoption brings to families on both sides of the adoption circle.  When Chloe's birth mother came into our life, we felt so much peace, relief, excitement and certainty that Chloe was meant to be a part of our family.  Her birth mother told us that she had felt so much anxiety and apprehension as she looked over the profiles of countless hopeful parents but when she came to ours, her feelings changed significantly. She was experiencing peace and even joy for the first time in months and she knew we were the right family for her little girl.  For this reason and more, we know that Heavenly Father is involved in this process and that He brings together lives that need to be blessed by one another.

Chloe's birth mother (and family) said they were blessed to find us.  We were certainly blessed by their strength, selflessness, and courage.  We were blessed with Chloe, who lights up our world!  And Chloe is blessed to have so many people who love her...her birth family and her adoptive family.  As we make preparations for another baby, we are overjoyed for what the future may soon bring us.  We hope that you can feel what great love we will share with your baby and how the magnitude of your choice to place him/her for adoption will never be lost on us or your child.  He or she will always be reminded of the remarkable person that you are and will always hold you close in their heart, as will we.

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